I'mpossible

by

Lakshmisree Raju

“ Hey! The fatty girl is here. Ha Ha Ha!”

“ Look at her, so ugly,”

 “Eww!, she spends the whole day studying that she doesn’t have time to make herself look decent.

“Girl, don’t you know your priorities?”

These are the kind of things that I hear every day when I enter my classroom. I have kinda gotten used to it, but still it hurts so bad.

Hearing these rude words, I silently went to my place. No matter how hard I tried, they always kept playing in my head. It was so disturbing! It just made me want to quit school.

I also don’t have many friends because of how I look, but I have Shreya. I may not have many friends but having one true friend is what that matters. There are people in this world who only have fake friends, so seen that way, I consider myself a very lucky person.

Shreya was the only person in my class who didn’t speak bad about me, instead she fought for me. I have always wished to be like her, to fight for myself, but I could never do it.

After class, I walked down the hallway to get to my next class, feeling very lonely. Shreya was sick so she didn’t come. I walked slowly to prevent people from noticing me. But I could hear people whispering behind my back. I tried to ignore them and go on with my work. I wished that Shreya was here.

Having support from her was the only thing that helped me with my depression , but one day it all changed!

It was recess and we all started having our lunches. Usually we both have food together, so I called her,

“Shreya! Come to my table to eat.”

“You can start eating , I’ll be there in some time.”

That is when I heard her say something unbelievable to the other girls with her. 

“She eats so much, that’s why she is like a pumpkin.” I saw them laughing.  “I wish I am not her friend , but I feel sorry for all the rude comments she gets.”

“No, you shouldn’t be sorry!” a girl in the group said.

I was shocked. My heart raced with rage. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. I never knew she could do this to me! Now each step I took I felt useless, dumb, ugly.

At night I tossed and turned sleeplessly. I really wanted to sleep but couldn’t. All I could hear were those words that I never knew could come out of her mouth. Tears of anger, sadness, and disbelief  flowed from my eyes.” Why can't I be beautiful like other people? It's impossible!” I screamed with hopelessness.

“Why did she do this to me? Am I really that ugly? Why does everyone talk only bad about me? If she doesn’t want to be my friend, why is she, then pretending to be?" As these dreadful thoughts rolled around in my head, my eyes closed and I fell asleep.

Next morning, I woke up as a different person. Fully energized , confident and no more insecure. I understood that I shouldn’t get influenced by what other people say about me, instead challenge myself and show them what I really was and that I could change too.

I don’t know from where I got that courage, but it really helped me.

And…about the friendship with Shreya…. I can't trust her like I used to, but I will just treat her as a normal ’hi-bye’ friend. I also needed to prove to her that even I could speak up for myself. I didn’t need anyone to do that for me.

That morning, I entered the school, with my head up. I heard people whispering about me , but I didn’t care.

At recess, Shreya asked me,” Hey, lets have lunch together, my mom has made your favorite.”

“Sorry, I have better things to do, and by the way, why do you want to give me your food if you think I eat too much? Don’t you also want to eat? Be careful I might finish your food.” I said sarcastically.

Her face turned red and she no longer looked me in the eye. She didn’t say a word and silently walked away. I think she was happy that I was not spending time with her anymore.

From that day, I decided to challenge them. For lunch, I brought a green salad. It was disgusting, but I was determined. They also made fun of me for bringing salad and said that I could never lose weight even if I tried.

I smiled to myself and thought, "you will regret saying that later.”

A week passed. My summer vacation started. This was my most favorite time of the year. No school, I could sleep late and wake up late and I could go to the pool every day. 

But this summer vacation was going to be different. I had a goal to achieve. 

I ate healthy and exercised every day . Week by week, I looked slimmer and more beautiful. People around me were astonished.

By the end of the vacation, I was in great shape and was ready to go to school to strike everyone dumb and overthrow my classmates.

On the day of reopening, I entered the class to see all my classmates open-mouthed. They couldn’t believe it. Many people apologized for being rude to me.

Shreya walked up to me and said in a very sorry voice,  "Hey, I am extremely sorry to hurt you. I actually didn’t mean to do that to you. Everyone made so much fun of me because I was your friend. That’s why I couldn’t help telling that to them. But I regret it now. Can we please be friends again?.”

“Yeah of course, I too miss the old times,” I said and gave her a big smile and a bear hug.